Part of 'growing up' is finding your feet. Creating a stable home for yourself. And if you're lucky to be in a happy relationship, well that makes things easier. But if you courageously go it alone, setting up a life can be tricky, but not impossible.
Here's some steps to 'finding some ground'.
1. Is living with your parents a viable option? There's no doubt there can be strain put on the family unit when you put two families under the one roof, but it's a strain most parents are willing to take on. If you find you are short on options, your parents should be the first people you should speak to. You might be surprised at how the conversation goes. Discuss things like boundaries, expectations, communal tasks and individual chores, and a payment/savings plan to cover board and lodgings. A payment plan is a great way to get yourself ready for the real world, creating a budget and savings habit. If living with your parents is not an option...
2. Look for shared accommodation. Rent these days are steep, but it's not going to suck you dry. Look for ways of reducing accommodation costs, like sharing a place with a friend, or even another single mum who has kids! That way the roof over your head will cost you much less, and you'll probably save on children's toys/clothes if you're willing to share. Remember too, living with other people can always cause strain so put in place some boundaries and expectations before you move in.
These websites are great for finding other people/other mums who are looking for a place to share, or have a place and are looking for a tenant.
www.space4.com.au
This website is dedicated to providing a forum for single parents looking to connect, whether it be for friendship, childcare arrangements and most importantly, share housing. There's a great search function to search specifically for younger mums. There is a small cost involved however, a 21 day membership will set you back $9.95 or a 12 month membership will cost you $49.95. The 21 day membership may be all you need to find someone, and it's probably worth the money.
http://melbourne.gumtree.com.au
Gumtree is great for community advertising. Try typing in 'single mum' in the search terms and there's usually a few listings of single mums seeking another single mum. You can also post ads for free on Gumtree, so you could make a listing called 'Single Mum with 2yo looking for house share' and you can name your price - people will contact you!
www.sharerent.com.au
Another great resource for finding share housing - not specific to single parents, but there are still plenty of single mums and dads looking to cut the cost of renting. This service is free.
www.share-house.com.au
Another great resource, much like Share Rent.com.
3. If sharing a place is not an option, remember you still have options! Finding a place on a budget is a tricky task. It takes a lot of time learning demographics and suburbs, and having a clear idea of which suburb will offer the best price for your so precious money. If you consider the inner suburbs of Melbourne, for example, the cost of a two bedroom flat can be that of a 3 bedroom house in the outer suburbs. On the flip side, outer suburbs, such as Boronia to Blackburn are primarily established residential areas and generally do not have lower cost housing such as flats/apartments, commonly found in inner city suburbs. So by looking at outer suburbs you're restricting yourself to a minimum of $300 - $400 per week for a house when you could get a two bedroom apartment in Caulfield for under $300 per week. It's something to consider.
Apartments are not the 'ideal' place for having children - there's usually stairs, no back yard, and other pesky, very intimately situated neighbours that might complain about the baby crying at 3am ("go fuck yourself" I'd say - but that's just me) but there are ways to overcome these issues to make apartment living more practical, such as:
1. don't bother about the backyard - it sounds ideal to have one to 'let the kids run around' but let's face it, we rarely use it, especially during winter, and it's a pain in the arse to maintain. Look for apartments with parks and playgrounds in walking distance. It will keep you fit and get the kids outside, more than 5 metres from the house. Also look for places with a communal garden that has upkeep included in the cost of rent.
2. Look for ground floor apartments. This way you're not carrying a baby up the stairs along with your handbag, the baby bag, and a bag full of groceries. But make note of the security of the ground floor apartments too, and if it's inadequate you can request better locks be installed by the landlord.
3. Look for apartments with less numbers on the block, i.e. one of four units is great, not one of 20. This limits the chances of having very nosey annoying neighbours (or as my sister calls them 'bitch face') glare at you in the communal parking bays. Also ask about other tenants to see if any have kids of their own.
A house sounds very nice, and surely it is. But to maintain a healthy doable budget, an apartment will suit just fine. Even a dingy one you can pretty up with flowers and pictures. And remember, you won't be there forever.
4. Your entitlements - whether you plan to be a full time mum or go back to work, you've got a vast variety of financial entitlements from the Government. It's best to book in to see someone at Centrelink to ensure you're claiming everything you're entitled to claim, but here's a brief overview:
Single Parenting Payment - should you choose not to work, you can claim up to $625 per fortnight.
Family Tax Benefit A - in addition to the Single Parenting Payment, you can claim up to $164.64 per fortnight.
Family Tax Benefit B - In addition to the above two, you can claim up to $140 per fortnight.
Maternity Immunisation Allowance - a one off payment of $129 when you have your child's immunisations up to date.
Rent Assistance - people who qualify for the above who pay rent usually qualify for Rent Assistance also, which can be up to $136.78 per fortnight (but your weekly rent must be more than $136 per week to qualify).
You'll likely qualify for a Pensioners Concession Card too, which gives you excellent savings on a range of everyday things, like electricity bills, train tickets, prescription medicines and even your car rego!
You should be eligible for Child Support payments from the father of the child/ren. If you go through the Child Support agency, they will give you an estimate of what you're entitled to and they will care for any communications and payment collection on your behalf. On the other hand, if you have a good relationship with the father, and he's willing to give you extra support, you don't legally have to stick to the legal minimum entitlement; the father can give you more financial help should you come to that arrangement.
On top of this, should you choose to work a casual job, you can earn up to $175 per week without affecting the above entitlements from Centrelink. After this amount, the payments drop incrementally.
Should you choose to work, you are entitled to the Child Care Benefit and Child Care Rebate, both of which make returning to work much easier. It effectively halves the cost of Child Care. So on average, child care will cost you about $80 a day. The government will subsidise about half of this, making it around $40 a day. You've just got to work out whether your wage justifies putting your children into care, and which option is more financially beneficial to you.
And then finally you've got the Baby Bonus or the Paid Parental Leave payments. The Baby Bonus is a payment given to those who may not work or are students. This is a total of $5,437 over 13 fortnightly installments. The Paid Parental Leave option is for those who have worked for 10 months of the preceding 13 months prior to the baby's birth. This can include casual, part timers or contractors, so long as they work a minimum of one day a week for 10 months (or equivalent). The payment for this is $589.40 (before tax) per week for 18 weeks.
See www.centrelink.gov.au for more information. Please note above figures are indicative only and accurate figures are based on individual assessment by Centrelink.
There are always options, even when you're a single parent. And there will always be someone there to help should you need it, whether it be your parents, friends, family, the church, the salvation army - you might just have to ask.
With love,
Ashleigh.
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